new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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