You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
