i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
