nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well most of my day revolves around power hour
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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