Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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