I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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