Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize