absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
