Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
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