so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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