I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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