I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
