I wanna bring you to show and tell
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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