i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
