The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Enjoy the penises
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