I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
