have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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