Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
