I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
