I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
