I must be too annoying 4 u.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
if only i could text you this smell
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
