question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
