their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
