a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just cut my nipple shaving
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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