my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
