i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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