So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
