Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
