I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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