The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
