I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
