if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
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So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
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Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.