So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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