Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Randomize
