that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
