After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
