I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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