handjob tips. give me some.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He? As in you personified your dick?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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