so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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