We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
