Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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