I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
