If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize