I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
