we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
last night I used snow as a chaser
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
