after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
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