The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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