If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
