they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Fuck me I smell like cheese
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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