She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I just found puke in my bra..
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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