On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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