If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
